*You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and shoves you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee?*
“Well because someone bumped into me, of course!”
You spilled the coffee because coffee was in the cup.
If tea had been in it, you would have spilled tea.
Whatever is inside the cup is what will come out.
Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which will happen), whatever is inside of you will come out. It’s easy to “fake it” until you get rattled.
It is good to ask ourselves, “what’s in my cup”?
When life gets tough, “what spills over”?
Is it Joy, gratefulness, peace, and humility?
Or anger, bitterness, harsh words, and actions?
Anger, love, peace, joy, etc., arise from our thoughts.
Your Thoughts lead to your Feelings, which lead to your actions, which lead to your Results. After proving yourself right over and over again, your thoughts become beliefs. Beliefs then become automatic thoughts that drive your behaviors, in other words, habits.
ANGER–can consume us, destroy us, and leave us broken–AND–Heal us if we want a healing.
Until we can become aware of this surge that can overtake us, we cannot heal it or even get a handle on it.
Resistance only fuels this emotional time bomb. Taking ownership of our emotional states can be scary; They can be seen as ugly, negative, harmful, and unacceptable.
Anger never gets us what we want, or maybe it does; Either way, it imprisons us and starts to kill the healthy, happy cells in our bodies, and…dis~ease, discomforts is created.
What do we do with this turned-up heated emotion?
- Acknowledge there is angry.
- Understand that we are never angry, upset, or mad for the reasons we think we are.
- Know that your anger is about YOU. Somebody pulled the trigger, and you are taking the bullet. YOUR choice.
- Take internal inventory with honesty, not shame, blame, guilt, and fear. But with self-compassion, understanding, and a hunger to explore where the anger is feeding. Remember, we can only meet ourselves as deeply as we believe ourselves to be. Notice that with compassion, not shame, guilt, or fear that it defines you.
Anger is tied to our personality, daily actions, beliefs, and how we see the world. Anger can be passed down from our ancestors. Anger is a learned behavior that needs to be understood and unlearned before managing those sudden upsets and outbursts.
Today let’s work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation for yourself and others; kindness, gentleness, love, and gratitude are unconditional gestures that are innate.
Mantra: As I breathe in, I cherish myself
“The trouble with anger is, it gets hold of you. And then you aren’t the master of yourself anymore. Anger is.”
~ Jeanne DuPrau
Join Self-love, Dolby DHarma