Of course, we take thinking for granted; it is something that just happens throughout the day. We generate thoughts all day long, some conscious and some not so much. Our minds are in constant motion, even when we sleep the brain never turns off.
When we have thoughts, they generate energy and of course they have an effect on us in some way, shape or form. We know this from experiences; when we are angry it changes us, and when we are joyful it changes us too, and when we put our stuff out there, the feedback creates energy. The point is that the thoughts we think about ‘ourselves’ are vital either way, negative or positive.
The opinion that you form about yourself is what shapes you, guides you into the decisions in your life, the kinds of friends you have, the job you choose and of course your ultimate relationship, the one with yourself.
More often than not what other people think of you usually reflects what you think of yourself. Unfortunately, we are so busy looking outside ourselves for direction, answers, the way and at the other person to see the ‘BIG’ picture. Your uniqueness!
There is a saying; “Your vibe attracts your tribe.” Over the many years I have been here on planet earth, I can see a lot of truth to that statement, not always, but for the most part, yes.
So how do we think better about ourselves? How do we accept who we are as an individual without fearing what others might think, more than what we believe? There is no quick fix with the exception of being mindful of how much you worry about what others think, or how it will look, and or question yourself as to why you need that input at all. If you seek an answer, you will find one.
Not all of us are comfortable making our decisions without the input of other people a lot of the time. Feedback, input all those things are very valuable to us and can guide us when we feel unsure. It is when we live to please the outside tribe, or not to upset the apple cart by living our way is the problem.
Like anything, it is a practice to hone in on your opinions without worrying about who is going to judge you. We are social by nature, and we love to talk and ask other people what they think about this, that and the other. People are well meaning and want you to adopt their perspective because it makes them feel more comfortable and secure, and you just might feel that too, after all, you won’t be in it alone.
There is nothing wrong with input, but what counts is where you put ‘it.’ ‘It’ meaning, stop being a people pleaser. It can be scary thinking outside the box or making a choice that is the opposite of what was suggested. When we don’t think for ourselves, it is most often because we are scared of disagreeing with others and afraid of “rocking the boat.” A freethinker, on the other hand, bases their self-worth on something other than what people think of them.
Freethinkers may still experience rejection, discomfort, and anguish, but they will continue to think for themselves.
When we like who we are, trust in ourselves, we make decisions that are unique to our wellbeing, not the opinions of others. Carolyn Myss says that when you have to run your story around it takes a lot of time and you have to ‘wait’ to make that decision, and it also ‘weighs’ you down. To move freely in life CHOOSE YOU and Rock the hell out of a lot of boats, because in the end, WE ALL benefit from FREE THINKERS, which by the way is an OPEN MIND that paves a new way! Trust YOURSELF more! Dolby Dharma
We begin life with the world presenting itself to us as it is. Someone — our parents, teachers, analysts — hypnotizes us to “see” the world and construe it in the “right” way. These others label the world, attach names and give voices to the beings and events in it, so that after that, we cannot read the world in any other language or hear it saying other things to us. The task is to break the hypnotic spell, so that we become undeaf, unblind and multilingual, thereby letting the world speak to us in new voices and write all its possible meanings in the new book of our existence. Be careful in your choice of hypnotists. ~Sidney Jourard